Consumer Mecca

I've had a DVD player for 13 days and watched 13 films. The other 2 (not pictured) are Spanglish and some unmentionable piece of American rubbish that I'm not even going to admit to watching. Basically, my free time is spent purchasing DVDs and CDs and then watching or listening to them. By the end of the year I'll probably have watched 200 films, although I'm going to have to lower my quality control, as I'll run out of alternative films at some point. I've got another 6 DVDs at home to watch over the next week. I could have got cable, but it's mainly sports or dodgy American films I don't want to watch. As an example, the high point of TV in the Hotel was the new Starsky and Hutch film, so you can imagine what the rest is like. As DVDs and CDs are only about 1 pound 15p each, I might as well buy 1 a day. I'm going to need a huge box to ship them all back to the UK. Obviously they're bootleg, but there are no copyright laws in Sri Lanka, so it's all good. The best surprise of the films so far was, "Me and You and Everyone We Know", but bare in mind my taste in films is slightly off key. It's American people trying to fit into normal life, but not doing it very well, whilst saying the things you think but never say. I read a collection of comedy sketches by an American called Bill Hicks, whose basis for comedy was to say the things you've thought but don't think you should ever tell anyone. Because we all self censor our own thoughts, there a lot of ideas and perspectives that don't get vocalised and these are often the most funny. If you've no idea what I'm blathering on about, just watch "Kill Bill 1 and 2" for action, "The Motorcycle Diaries" as a regular film buff film or "Fahrenheit 9/11" to see just how messed up the USA and the UK are politically. So ends Film 2005. What ever happened to Barry Norman cause Jonathon Ross is pants?
I was also pretty stocked to find I can still get some alternative music out here. It's not exactly Rough Trade or Selectadisc, but in amongst the rubbish there are some little gems. I won't make any musical recommendations, as that's an even bigger can of worms than the movies.
I might do a "Spot the Fake Clothing" quiz some time as that's my other hobby. I was caught out once as there's a shop called "House of Fashion" out here, that lot's of people say sell genuine gear, but is full of fakes. I've bought a few original items of clothing pretty cheap and some fakes dirt cheap. If I don't do anything interesting in the next few days I'll do the "Find the Fake" quiz. On an up note, I've just had an e-mail confirming the location of the only skate ramp in Sri Lanka, in Hikkaduwa. At least it's only a couple hours out of Colombo and a 60p train ride each way. Praise be to Jah

Trouble in Paradise

The tone of the following words aren't going to match the photos, but that's life sometimes.
I got up about 7 on Christmas day, showered, packed a rucksack with 3 T-shirts, a camera, sun-tan lotion, insect repellant and that's about all. I left the house at 8.15, hailed a tuk (3-wheeler), stopped at the backery to grab a bit of breakfast and headed to Fort Railway Station to catch the 9 am train to Hikkaduwa. I'd been warned about the trains so I wasn't expecting a seat, just a cheap ride to the coast. Ticket was 90 Rs, which isn't bad for a 2 hour, 90km train journey. Between Colombo and the first stop I was in what I'll call the meat slicer or scythe spot. Where 2 carriages meet there are 2 metal plates, 1 protruding from each carriage, which you can walk on and that stop you dropping down between the carriages. The gaps at the sides and top are filled with rolls of rubber that compress and expand as the train turns. As the rubber had stopped fully expanding over time, if the bumps in the track knocked you off balance you could get at least an arm through the gap, although I don't know how much you'd get back.
Back to the scythes of death. The metal plates that had started with 5 to 10 mm square edges had been worn into sharp blades, which looked like they could slice the soles of your feet off at any moment. No one else seemed bothered and I kept my feet 6 inches from where the metal was worn to a shine and gripped the side wall of the carriage until my fingers went white. After the first stop I pushed my way to the middle of a packed carriage, so the worst I had to worry about was ending up on someone's lap.

Up until now all was as expected, a bit of ghetto tourism is all good when you know you don't actually have to put up with any of it if you don't want to. Slightly dubious morally, but what you gonna do? They need the cash, slumming adds a little spice. I think all you can do is try and spend your money in the right places but as you'll see, it wasn't to be.
A Sri Lankan approaches me on the train and starts chatting. Apparently he'd studied French in Jersey and knew Weymouth as he had travelled to Jersey from there . He advised getting off at the stop before Hikkaduwa, his home town of Ambalangoda, and checking out The Reclining Budda, Turtle Farm, Gem Mine, the Lagoon and getting a free massage at the Herb Garden. It all seemed so easy and I just needed to relax after a month in Colombo. I'd actually read about the place already so I thought why not. He then proceeded to tell me what the fair price was for the local attractions, which is where it started going pear shaped. The hotel would cost about 6 pounds, the lagoon boat trip 50 pounds, turtles 3 pounds, budda 1 pound, transport 4 pounds an hour and the massage was free. The 2 things that were over priced were the lagoon boat trip and the transport. I only had about 36 quid on me anyway, so I didn't intend to do the boat trip this time. I thought I'd settle in, find a hotel and go from there. I got off the train still thinking, "Boy, aren't Sri Lankan people friendly and Buddhists are such selfless people". After my new acquaintance pretends to barter the tuk driver down for me, his mate in the tuk then proceeds to take me straight to the Lagoon (where I thought I could get some food and a drink) and tries to persuade me into taking the wild life lagoon boat trip straight away. Feeling harassed, my mood turns super sullen and I sulk until the driver takes me back to town. At this point I'm not smiling and just want to be left alone. I've hit full moodymowlam mode and nothing is going to bring me out of it. I gave the driver the 400 Rs for 40 minutes (half a days hire in Colombo) and sat in the hotel glaring at anyone that came up to ask me where I'm from (it wears thin when you get asked it every 10 minutes, especially when I'm not the biggest fan of small talk normally). I walked down onto the beach and realised there's nothing to do on a beach, especially when your skin feels like it's turning into Pork Scratchings every second you're exposed to the sun. I walked back to the train station thinking maybe Hikkaduwa will be different.
Hikkaduwa is more touristy and I now get people asking me where I'm from every 1 or 2 minutes as I walk along the beach.
It looks beautiful, but I'm feeling like a lobster being boiled alive. I'm actually not burning as I have factor 50 sun-cream on, but it doesn't stop me feeling like I am. I walked into a restaurant and ordered a curry and a drink. One thing I am getting used to is eating curry every day. My mood is still dark and nothing shifts one of my dark moods except time and that's hours, not minutes.
Blow it, I'm out of here as well and start walking back along the main street towards the station and the train back to Colombo. People are still coming up to me and asking where I'm from and it really isn't helping me out. The place is built around tourism and that's the main source of local income so it's understandable. (Quick aside: Photo of house under construction for Dad as he is fascinated by the variations in building methods all over the world. The shuttering for the ceiling is supported by an untold number of wooden supports. I couldn't see but I'm guessing there are woven metal bars creating the reinforcing metal mesh for the ceiling / floor. You can also see the metal bars protruding upwards to provide the supports for the first floor ceiling. I think the support pillars on the ground floor are already boxed in with shuttering, but it's hard to see.) Back at Hikkaduwa train station are 3 carriages of a train that was swept off the track during the Tsunami and on which hundreds of people must have died. It was the first year anniversary of the Tsunami the next day but for some reason it seemed like an ancient relic.I was back in Colombo with a beer watching a DVD by 9.00 pm as if I'd never left. Writing this a couple days afterwards I'm planning to head back, but I know what to expect this time. Having a harder attitude at the start saves a lot of hassle down the line. I've also just found some photos of the first skate ramp in Sri Lanka, which is in one of 2 places, one of them being Hikkaduwa. I'll wait and see what happens and I still intend on visiting the Reclining Budda as it's the biggest in Sri Lanka. I understand why the people are like they are, but it doesn't make it any easier to deal with if you're tired and not in the mood for it. Live and learn.

Christmas Eve on Thimbirigasyaya Road

I took some snaps on my way into town on Christmas Eve. I live at the quieter end of this street, where there aren't any pavements; you have to walk on the edge of the drainage ditch, by the side of the road, to to avoid getting getting hit by the nutty motorists. Lurking in the shadows of the previous photo are the local homeless crew. They don't seem to move much all day. They also seem to have quite bizarre sleeping habits and can be found crashed out at any time of the day. Some of them must work or beg for money to get food, as the rest of them don't harass me like the beggars on the main streets in town. I read that most households get less than 200 Rs a day (1 pound 20).
You are here, or more accurately, I was here and pass by here on a daily basis.

Fifties throwback

Up, down, turn around, please don't let me hit the ground. Tonight I think I'll walk alone, find myself as I go home.This is my walk home along Havelock Road. The first photo is of some Christmas lights. It's too hot for Christmas and hopefully I'll be taking the train down the coast on the 25th. The second photo is down towards the junction for my road, which is well hectic at rush hour. My street is a lot mellower apart from the homeless people you have to step over sleeping on the street, but then this is the posher part of Colombo.
Got my first proper hair cut in 8 years. I've been clippering it myself back in the UK. Ghetto cuts are us. Cost the grand total of 200 Rs, which is about 1 pound 20.
Barber kindly pointed out I was receding, boy that was a shock to the system, I'd never noticed.
WW2 Spitfire pilot just back from the war. Would you like some Brylcream with that short back and sides sir. Something for the weekend perhaps?

Killing in the name of

Killing in the name of my own sanity. I think I've probably killed all the roaches now but Rentakill visited today, just to put my mind at rest. Random photo of the tree in my lounge, rocking chair and skateboard. Went for my first skate around the streets of Colombo on Sunday and attracted a fair bit of attention. I don't think many people had seen a skateboard before. I gave a little kid a go and he took to it straight away. The only thing was, when I took it back he tried to wrestle it back off me and followed me down the road until I skated off as fast as I could. Won't be doing that again as it's too much of a pain. Skateboarding is addictive like that.
Crazy baby photo stuck to the inside of a tuc that made me laugh. Baby Budda
First trip out of the city and boy did it feel good. The pineapples were super sweet and the prices are in rupees, which are worth just over half a pence. Big pineapples for 25p anyone. Is it common knowledge that they grow on the end of a stalk? For some reason I thought they grew from trees like coconuts. If you enlarge the photo you can see they are upside down with the end of the stalk still attached. Maybe I'm the only one who didn't know that. Getting the rest of my house contents on Saturday and the maid comes round then to clean as well. I should be sitting pretty by next week. I'm off to sing carols tonight, yes you did hear that right. Fake snow and carols in the tropics, not exactly what I was expecting. Just got to avoid the booze as more than two pints is a killer for me in this heat.

Hotel Mowlam

My new home. I was shown around several luxury european style apartments that I could have rented. They were at the top of my price range but would have allowed me to live in an environment acceptable to most westerners. They were all a bit soulless so I asked to see some local style houses; taste a little of the Sri Lankan lifestyle. This is my upstairs lounge (above) and my bedroom (below), which now has AC. It's the only room in the house that does and the landlord had to get the holes above the window covered with glass to keep the cooled air in. Every other room in the house has the same holes above the windows to let the air flow. There is even a plant downstairs in the lounge, which gets water from the openings in the porch above. You may have worked out by now that there's nothing to stop small creatures getting in or out. I didn't really think about it too much when looking round as I wanted to taste the local lifestyle. I moved in yesterday and laughed my ass off at my naivety. First guests to meet me were 4, 2 to 3 inch cockroaches living in the kitchen. Boy did they make me jump. They've all got a headache now. Bug powder is now top of the shopping list. Next I see a gecko running up the wall. Apparently geckos are cool as they eat the mosquitos. Still gave me a suprise when he moved into my holdall when I wasn't looking. It's all good as I'm now thinking of it as camping indoors. All my food is staying in the new fridge & I don't think I'll be cooking much. Eating out is dirt cheap so it's not worth cooking anyway. Just need a fridge for drinks and snacks. It is really cool but be warned if you're think of coming to visit. I'll have sorted the cockroaches ASAP. Actually slept really well & only used the ceiling fan as the AC is noisy. If I can't handle the heat now, I not going to handle it when it gets super hot around April time. The view above is from my upstars landing at about 6.30am. The sun came up & woke me up. The daylight only varies by about 30 mins all year as Sri Lanka is right on the Equator. The air flowing round the house is cooling so it's a nice time of the day in the early morning. This lady is stuck to the inside of my wardrobe. She's looking after me while I stay in the house.

Galle Face Green

This is Galle Face Green outside the hotel I was staying in. Sri Lankans come here at the weekend to chill & hang out. It's a bit ghetto compared to Weymouth beach but it's all good. The area was cleared by the Dutch to give the cannons in the fort a better aim.
I bought a Sprite for about 20p. It was warm but you've got to drink. The cap was rusty so it may well have been past it's sell by date. I took a cab ride round the city last Sunday. It was good to see that there are lots of mellower areas such as parks, temples & monuments. I'll have to wait untill my bike arrives to get a proper perspective. Only thing is it's so hot here you can't really do anything in the middle of the day. It's all right indoors as everywhere has AC. The mad thing is this is the cool season.

Tuk Tuk

Tuks are the best adrenalin buzz I've had since being here. If feels like you're going so fast but it's only because it's so rickety & the driver is swerving to avoid potholes all the time. It's better late at night when the roads are clear.